So this past Wednesday my sister and I decided to leave for Easter vacation alittle early and surprise my parents. It was awesome!!! I have not had the chance to surprise my parents since college so it was fun to see my Mom's face when we walked in the door. Very priceless moments. :) I will admit being home and having my mother spoil me for a couple days was amazing!!! I think ever since I found out that I was pregnant I have just missed being home. I think the combination of going through something that you have never gone through before and then combine that with the constant nausea and vomiting I guess I just got alittle overwhelmed. And when I get overwhelmed I tend to want to be in a familiar place which for me is back home where my parents are. Everything there just kinda..I dont know...doesnt seem as scary or challenging. Maybe its just that I have been blessed with an amazing relationship with (in my opinion) the best parents in the world!
Yeah I know that we are supposed to challenge ourselves and live our lives out of our comfort zones. But seriously people there is nothing wrong with just wanting to be near your Mom sometimes. I am the type of person who likes to know everything about every new stage of life. I right notes, I read books, I research until I literally cannot think anymore. This is a blessing and a curse because while I might be prepared I am also so overwhelmed with so much information and thats when I tend to crash. Thats when the worries, the fear, the anxious thoughts of whether im mommy material start creeping into my brain. So add all of these thoughts with the fact that I was going so stir crazy being at home because I was so sick for so long and you have a the potential for an atom bomb effect in my home. I am pretty sure my husband was so easy to convince about letting me go home because he could see this potential disaster and wanted to be as far away as possible :) Needless to say an emotional explosion was averted as soon as I walked into the door of my parents house and smelled the familiar house smell, and ate my mommas good food, and enjoyed laughing and joking around with my sisters and brother. Like old times. Honestly I do not remember the last time when our family was together like that and it was the best medicine in the world for this overly emotional and slightly irrational pregnant woman.
After being on this trip I have learned and was reminded of a couple of things. The pregnant sicky feeling will go away.....eventually, I really love my own bed despite this amazing vacation, that family is more important then anything else, and nothing compares to my Moms home cooking. But more importantly I was reminded by my incredible smart Mother that the Lord has a plan for this baby and that while I will never be the perfect mother He will guide and direct me to be the the kind of mother this baby needs. All the books and research and note taking can not compare to just allowing God to work everything together the way he sees fit.
It was an amazing weekend and yes, I did shed a few tears as we drove away from my parents house. I think it was a combination of being upset that I ended up throwing up my mothers wonderful Easter lunch and just being so thankful for the time I got to spend with them and not really wanting it to end. Thankfully I have a husband who understands my ridiculous need to cry all the time and is always there with a supportive shoulder and a joke or two to make me laugh.
All in all it was an wonderful little getaway and I am so thankful for my amazing family, for my wonderful husband and his family and more importantly for God orchestrating my life in such a way that I have the awesome blessing to be surrounded by the most encouraging support system. It truly is gift.
