The Good, the bad, and the beautiful moments of motherhood thus far....

So I have been a mom now for 6 weeks...6 WEEKS!!....where has the time gone. I mean I was always told that the older you get the faster life goes, but I guess I just never understood what that meant. There are so many things that I have learned since becoming a Mom. Once Jonah was born I realized that while I was pregnant I was a Mom, yes, but not until this little man was placed on my chest did I realize what that truly meant. So here are my thoughts of motherhood thus far.

The first lesson I realized is that breastfeeding is no joke. I mean I guess I always believed those ads you see where the Mom is looking absolutely perfect with hair done and makeup flawless and she is smiling down at her little one. Her baby is in the perfect nursing position, perfectly latched on and perfectly content....yeah, ummmmmm that's a bunch of crap. At least in my experience nursing has been not so blissful...don't get me wrong...I enjoy that fact that I can give my baby what he needs and there are some moments that are okay. But those ads paint a picture that's not so true all the time. Like when I am up at 4 am, half asleep, with a screaming infant who wont latch on, and then proceeds to puke down my shirt.....sigh....yeah . But, all ranting aside, despite my not so blissful experience I have to say it is worth it. It is worth going through the pain and the frustration for those beautiful moments when my son looks up at me after eating, full, satisfied and smiles. It makes all the late nights, all the puked on shirts, and all the tears of frustration completely worth it.
Another lesson I have learned is that being a Mom is a sacrifice. You might be thinking well..DUH! I know, I know...I knew it would be, but I didn't realize that it meant the possibility of not getting a shower some days until before I fall asleep, or that my clothes would become burp clothes, or that my normally clean house would turn into a messy house (that drives me crazy). But again its worth it because while I may have to learn to suck it up and deal with these things, what I gain is moments with my son that I may never get back. Lets face it I can always fit in a shower at some point, clothes can be replaced, and there will always be dirty dishes and dirty laundry whether I have a new born or not. What I wont always have are these precious moments. I have been able to see him become more alert and recognize my voice, I get to comfort him when he doesn't feel good. I get to memorize his face while he's sleeping in my arms. These are the moments I wont get back. So I have learned to take quick showers, wear clothes I do not care about unless I am going out, and not get all bent out of shape when my house does not look the way I want, because enjoying these priceless moments with my son are worth more than all of that.
Another lesson I have learned is that I am a paranoid parent. Yes, its true. It may not shock you, but it sure shocked me. I mean I have been around kids so much that I thought I was not going to let little things get to me. Like how often he is passed around, or whether peoples hands are sanitized, or worrying my head off about his safety. Well, I proved myself wrong. I am pretty much always concerned about passing him around depending on who we are with. Most of the time when I am with other people inside I just want to be like: "I am sorry but you can only look at my son and while your at it please do not touch him or breathe near him." I also feel the need to order hazmat suits for visitors so that germs do not come near him. In fact if I could install a shower room outside my house where people could be sanitized before entering my home that would be even better. I understand how ridiculous this sounds. I mean I have argued with myself so many times to just chill out. I mean yes he is fragile, but just like every other baby they can with stand more then we realize. (I still think the hazmate suits are a good idea though).

Despite my breastfeeding nightmares, the sacrifices that I am learning to make, my paranoia and countless other lessons I have learned so far I could not be more grateful for my life right now. I mean I am living my dream job!!! Seriously, this is all I have ever wanted. Be married to the man of my dreams and be a stay at home Mom. I know some might think I am insane to want that and honestly it may not be for everyone. But its what God has called me to do. It is what he designed me to do and I love it!!!

So for those out there that are new moms or moms to be hang in there. We got this!! You will have good moments and bad moments. You will feel like a bad mom at times, you will probably shed a few tears, but I promise you its all worth it. So take a breath, let it out and enjoy the good, the bad and the beautiful moments of motherhood.  :)